Total Forgiveness

What is total forgiveness? It goes much more deeper than just the definition of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a two way street. Not only do you want to forgive, but you need it as well even if the fault of the circumstances doesn’t point to you. No matter the situation, you need to look at it from all vantage points. Why did this person do this to you? What did you do in return? Why does the situation keep resurfacing and are you feeding into that fire?

There is a rabbit hole of endless questions that you will always want to know why the situation even happened to begin with. But all you can is let it “smolder”, and don’t throw gas on the fire. So why does this person have such an issue with you? You have to realize that some people, good and bad, don’t know any better. It’s their way of getting a whatever attention they can from other people. They want people to feel pity for them and everything that happens in life surrounds only their feelings.

Step one, forgive. When you give forgiveness, you will receive it as well, not necessarily from that person, but you will get it. You get what you give, reap what you sow.

Step Two, Realize that you can not always understand why or how, but just know the outcome will be in your favor when you do good things.

Step Three, Pray. Mother Teresa said we need to do this more and more on a daily basis, but not just when we are “in need”, but just everyday conversation.

Step Four, Allow time (even if it seems to drag on), to run its course. All things (thoughts and purpose) have to end. If you keep the thoughts alive in your mind, then you will continue to feed the bad energy that was created. Let it go.

Step Five. Live your life like the situation didn’t happen. This will bring a new energy to help end all things bad. In your mind, you know, whatever the circumstance, wasn’t your fault, you just happen to cross paths with a negative energy flow. Keep moving forward and do good things, for all things will end.

Forgiveness come in many ways. Allow yourself to give it, even when it’s hard to do. In the end, total forgiveness will set your troubled heart free.


15 Minutes that changed my life.

I had actually written a blog about this many years ago, but wanted to re-write this so I can re-live it as well.

from 1992 till 2003, I had worked as a ramp supervisor for Continental Airlines.  One of my jobs was to help passengers on and off planes that couldn’t do it themselves.  Over the years I have helped cancer patience, handicap, and elderly but, nothing would have tug on my heartstrings as did a 16 year old passenger named Jessica.

We had a plane that just landed from Houston and I was already  made aware that there was a passenger that would need help leaving the airplane with the need of an Isle chair (wheel chair for airplanes) and to have a skycap standing by at the gate with an electric cart.   As the plane rolled up, I waited for all the passengers to exit off so I could help my “special Assist” passenger.   This was a quick turn-around flight, so I didn’t have much time to smell the roses.  As the last passenger left the plane, the flight attendant waved me on board.  I walked to the middle of the plane where I saw two women standing, retrieving items from the overheads, and a young girl still sitting down.  With me I had brought the isle chair in which the passenger is strapped in and wheeled out.  I remember her saying…   “Are you going to help me today?”  I said, “Yes ! I am your Superman!”  The mother had pulled me aside to let me know that Jessica was paralyzed from the stomach down and would require special help getting her out.  I had also noticed she had an IV attached to her.  When I asked, her mom told me that she has cancer.

Right at that moment, I felt very emotional.  How can this beautiful 16 year old girl be paralyzed and have cancer?  A million thoughts went through my head as I prepared the isle chair for her.  Right then,  I told her I wanted to not use the chair and just carry her off the plane…. I didn’t think she needed the experience of being an object.   So, I leaned way in and scooped her up.  As soon as I got her placed where I could carry her over the seats and to the front door, I could feel myself beginning to tear up.  She held on to me with little strength and her head laid on my chest as I walked down to exit the plane.

All the way up the jet-bridge I could feel the tears running down, at the same time, I could hear the waiting passengers in line at the gate.  As we made are way through the gate door,  almost in an instant, all went silent.  Everyone watched as this little girl who couldn’t walk, be seated on the waiting electric cart.   Thinking back on that moment, I hoped that even just for a second, all those passengers could remember that we are all human and that rushing to a destination wasn’t the most important thing they experienced that day.

I put Jessica on the cart, gave her a kiss on the cheek as she smiled at me.  I turned around and and her mother could see the tears I had.  She grabbed my wrist and said “Thank you so much for making her day.  Jessica hates being put in those chairs.  This means so much to her and me.”   her mom asked my for my name, and I waved at them as the cart drove off.  I went back through the gate, and lost it.  Emotional overload just took over for a couple of minutes.  Those 15 minutes changed a lot about the way I was living.

A few months had gone by and I had received a card at work from Jessica’s mom.  She wanted to thank me again from doing more then what she expected and that Jess was hoping I would be there when she was scheduled to fly again.  As I kept reading, I learned that would never happen.  Jessica had passed away a couple of weeks after our encounter.  I remember staring off into space and those emotions came rushing back.  How could someone I only met one time make me breakdown?  It called being human and being humane… to care, even if it’s just for a second, an acknowledgment, a nod, or even just a smile.

It’s been 20 years ago since this happened and I still think about it from time to time. Even now, typing this, it brings me back to that moment like it is frozen in time, a memory I will always hold on to.   Thank you Jess for allowing me just 15 minutes in your life.

The Art of Being Robbed of your Joy

It is a true art to be able to take away someone’s joy, their happiness, and destroy any hope of recovery.  Each one of us have this power and we seem to be keen on using it often.  It can be easily done with a few words on our keyboard, our phone and then off to social media where the damage can take true affect.  But why do we doo this on a regular basis and most of the time we don’t realize we even did anything.  The power of words are stronger than Joshua’s ram’s horn.  Words tear down more than walls, they tear down a person’s credibility and their character.

The funny thing about all of this, on the flip side, we have an even stronger power.  We have an internal flame that never burns out, and this we rarely use.  These are words that can build a person’s confidence, tear down obstacles, allow us to climb the highest mountain to our dreams.  It’s simple,  it’s so simple.  “Love”.   A true four letter word that has more powerful meaning than any other word in your vocabulary.  It sits in us waiting to be used at a moment’s notices, but we let it fade away.

Our reliability on social media to keep in touch with one another has taken away human touch and the ability to care for each other.   A phone call has now turned into a text which then turns into a facebook message or post.  Yes it’s easy to communicate like this, but we lose the true feeling behind the words being spoken.  We simply lose touch with our friends and family.

I remember in 1992, I was working at the airport and a pilot had a new Sony Startac cell phone.  Compared to today’s phones, this was like sending smoke signals, but it was the beginning of the end on how we communicate.    In less than 20 years we have IPhone,Android phones, technology grew leaps and bounds while we became these creatures that stare at our screens more than we speak to another person while we walk aimlessly into a beautiful sunset that we never even notice.  And before you know it,  we appear and then fade away.

Using the right words without texting them has a true meaning and power to them.  Always use “Words of gold” my mother used to tell me.  Instead I have let my thumbs and voice-text take over my words of cubic zirconia.    Can you image if Jesus was using text? haha,  then we would really be lost.  But I wonder if he is on Instagram?

Just a Thought…..


It’s not all about you….. it’s all about what you do.

My mother had left each of us a note before she died, tuck away in her nightstand, not to be found until a few weeks after her passing.  She had a message for each of us, and it wasn’t sweet words of past memories, her words her bold and precise.

In my letter,  she mentioned how difficult I was as a child, going through life’s challenges and obstacles.    Some of her words were harsh and eye opening about not judging people, not letting certain things take away your joy.  But her ending words were simple…..   “Do on to others, as you would have them do onto you.”    No, these words are not new, but how often did I or do I follow them?   How often do I let daily obstacles take away my joy, my happiness, my path I chose to follow?

Over the past several years, I have allowed her passing to put me in a small box, feeling like I was trapped.  This was my own “padded room” that I had built around myself, feeling lost and waiting for the right answer to open the door to get out.   The problem was, I let my emotions take over a huge portion of my life, hiding away and only peeking out from time to time.

One day I had a thought from one of the sentences in my mom’s letter to me…..  a part of it said “It’s not all about you.”   How often do we make life “about us” on a daily basis, several times a day?  If we could see life through another person’s eyes, we might find more pain in them, then we do for ourselves.   You don’t know what goes on in another person’s life.

What can we do to change it?   Dr Wayne Dyer said it best….  “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”   Take whatever circumstance you have and look at it differently.  Instead of a threat or something difficult,  “change it” to a challenge that will help you grow.  After all, growth through life’s experiences is true knowledge that we can pass on and share to others, so they too may learn and grow.

So it’s not all about you…. it’s al about what you do durning your short time on this Earth.  Actor Michael Landon once said…   “Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of every day. Do it! I say, Whatever you want to do, do it now! There are only so many tomorrows.”



How Modeling Agencies Work….

I have been asked so many times on how to start in the modeling business.  Yes I’m a photographer but let me give you a little background.  I was a model represented by Elite Models & Wilhelmina in Miami and NEXT & Ford in Los Angeles.  I know how the “big boys” work and I know how the local small agencies can be complete ripoffs.

How and agency makes it’s money.  Let’s say you are with Ford Models and a client wants to hire you to model their next ad campaign. To keep the numbers easy, let’s say the job pays $1000.  The client will have to pay Ford  20%-25% (Agency fee) of that $1000.  After the job is done, you get a check but not for $1000, because the agency will take out 20%-25% of your check as well.  So the agency basically just made $500 of the $1000.  Make sense?    And let’s not forget you will have to pay taxes on your check, which is roughly 30%  This means you just made $595 on a $1000.  Now just divide how many hours your worked on the job and you will get your hourly amount.

Professional Models are real working people, not just someone calling themselves a model. This means they make their income from modeling, making it a real business.  What does it cost??  When I was in Miami, I paid between $400-$700 for photos from professional photographers that my agency recommended.  But they allowed you to work with whoever you wanted to.

Small local agencies…..  I have seen this so many times on how these agencies (if you really want to call them that) rip people off.  Here in Louisville there isn’t a huge market for models.  Now there is work but not enough for an agency to justify having over 500 models to their roaster.  During peak season in Miami which runs from January to around May, agencies Like Elite, Ford, NEXT, and other have about 100 female models and 50 or so male models.  Now keep in mind this is peak season in a city that is booming with advertising jobs for models.  Now ask yourself why an agency in Louisville takes in model after model in a city that doesn’t have anything compared to Miami or Los Angeles.???

How do these small agencies their money ?  The same way I mentioned above with the %%, but these people will charge you over $1000 for photos….. they require you to take “classes” on how to model, which isn’t free.  They typically charge over $1000 for that as well.  This means anyone can be a model as long as you’re willing to pay the money.  There are also other things you will have to pay…..  Want to be seen by clients? The agency  will want you to pay a monthly fee and then there are different packages for that as well.   There is an agency in Louisville that needs $33,000 a month to stay afloat…. pay salaries, overhead etc.  This is why they take in so many models, but I can tell you that 90% of those models will not ever see work or ever make back the money they spent to be a model….which you should never need to pay anyway.

kevin fr

More Strength then you’ll ever know

Erin Gentry is one of my very best friends.  She motivates people, she is always wanting to give and help wherever she can.  But what you don’t know or even notice is something she doesn’t talk about.  I had asked her during her shoot, if she would mind if I wrote about it.

Behind all this fitness…. the diets, the hard work she puts into life everyday,  Life was almost taken away from her 6 years ago.  Take a look at her picture and look right below her navel… see it?  That scar isn’t just there from something simple.  Erin is a Ovarian Cancer survivor.  At 30 years old she had 3 malignant tumors  removed that weighed 11lbs.  She had to have emergency surgery that nearly took her life and then underwent a full hysterectomy.  You would never know by looking at her today where she was 6 years ago.  She is a true motivation in every sense of the word…. a true survivor and such an awesome friend.

Treat everyday as a gift, treat people as you would want to be treated….  and always look at life knowing that you are part of a much larger picture.


Kevin Talley


A return to my blog……

It’s been a long time that I’ve written in my blog…. most people don’t know but I had and still have a passion for helping people “create change” in their lives. In October of 2010 I did my last speaking engagement at the SLS Hotel in Beverly Hills titled.. “Creating Change.” My mother had just passed way 3 months earlier from brain cancer. To this day, I don’t even know how I was able to put a sentence together at that event as my emotions were all over the place.
Someone, just the other night, had commented on one of my blogs post from 3 years ago. It brought back a lot of memories of a direction I thought I was going to follow. Photography was not even an option or a thought at that time. I had only done it as a hobby, not even that. But there something to be said when we are able to make a new choice and choose a new direction outside our comfort zone. Public speaking to me was something I had loved but had fallen out of that path. Not because I didn’t want to… I had new doors opening that I needed to realize.
We all make choices that will impact how we live our lives everyday, even if we decided to smile at a passing stranger.
Where were you 5 years ago?? Where are you now? It’s a great idea to reflect on these past times and future hopes so re can realign ourselves in such a way to make a positive difference.

Photography for me has been such an outlet for things I had inside of me that I wasn’t even aware of. I do my best to keep my own little world to myself and wish people great success and help them if I’m able. Most of us never look “inward” for help, where most, if not all, the answers lay. We need to surround yourself with good people and good actions…. this will only benefit you because we become our surroundings. So everyday you need to take a look at what, and who you are surrounding yourself with.
True friends will never judge you or talk bad about you and you should do the same in return. You don’t need to walk on top of people in order to get somewhere… true friends will pick you up and carry you.
Find your happy place and be content knowing that you will always draw a following of friends, a group that will talk about you and others that for some reason just not like you at all. It’s how some people interpret information because they are not happy in their current circumstance. When you know these types of people are out there, you can ready yourself on not your actions… but your reactions. Your reactions will speak volumes of the person your are and how people will perceive you.
Like Mother Teresa once said…. “It was always between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

Keeping life in-focus.

Kevin Talley


Your wall comes crumbling down….

We all have them and the ironic thing is we are the ones who built them…..  WALLS.  Of course I’m not talking about a construction of a home, I’m talking about every obstacle we face everyday.

An interesting fact is we seem to blame our obstacles on other people.  Relationships, money, jobs, friends etc.  But you have to admit, we have all had the “gut instinct” that tells us to move on, or to change direction, but we don’t listen most of the time.

So how do we knock down these walls?  First step is the biggest, and I already mentioned it.  You need to take credit for putting your labor hard-hat on and laying down the bricks.  Each one of these bricks have the same ingredients…   fear, hate, doubt, disassociation with others, the feeling of being alone.  Each brick was made with your own intentions and you feed it cement (your energy) everyday. Acknowledgment is the number one step you need to take.  

Taking down these walls takes a lot of work, after all, you put a lot of cement on it.  You have to learn to re-think how you think,  how you react to others, learn to trust, learn to love and to stop feeling alone.  The great thing is when you start have these traits come into play, it acts like a huge sledge hammer.  The more you change your emotional actions and thoughts, the sledge hammer gets larger and soon turns into a wreaking ball.

Remember this…. life flows in one direction.  When you go against the flow, you are fighting, swimming, and struggling with life.  You just have to “let things be” and learn to create a new outlook on life.  You built it, you created it, and you can take down as well.

Start swinging !

Keeping Life in-Focus,

Kevin Talley    The Tall Guy With The Camera. 




There really isn’t a such thing as “failure”. Failure is only a way of learning how to accomplish your dreams and see things through. Without failure, you cannot succeed in anything you do.
Feel safe know that you are in the right place an the right time for everything to happen when it’s meant to. But never, ever give up on what you have inside of you…. your dreams and goals are real to you.

Keeping Life In-Focus,
Kevin Talley… Tall Guy With The Camera

Surpassing you own expectations….

We all have dreams we want accomplish.  This can only be done in one way……   stepping outside your comfort zone.  But even with that, there are smaller sub “zones” you must go through as well.  The most important one  “Failure”.  Yes, failure is a key component to success and you can research this for yourself.  So I’m going to skip the novel and get right to the climax and ending of this book.  

You can have all the best ideas in the word but if you do not have the emotion drive behind it to push forward your dreams and goals, they will not happen.  Drive to finish something you started says a lot about you.  Without drive it would be a pretty boring world, filled with re-runs of Hee Haw and Love Boat.  

Self-talk is another huge, if not the top element.  It’s how we speak to ourselves in our minds.  “I’m not good enough.”  “Why even bother?”  “No one will like it.”   “I hate……   ”    The words we speak about ourselves are either incredibly uplifting, or severally damaging.  The interesting part is that we are in complete control of it….  just like we are of other habits like eating, smoking, drinking, and lifestyle choices.  I’ve said this is previous blogs but I want to repeat it….  “We become our surroundings.”   Make sure you read that and write it down.  Consider it a life rule if you will.  If you hang out with party people…. you become that.  Hang out with people who gossip… you become that.    Are you getting this yet ?

Another HUGE component,  emotion baggage.  One of the most difficult things to drop off at the door, is our feelings of hurt from the past.  If you were in a relationship where you were emotionally hurt, cheated on, etc…  your mind puts “relationships”  in a category of “Relationships = pain”.   Make sense?  So when you keep your mind on that equation…. you will actually find more of what you don’t want… more pain.  Instead you have to re-train how you think.  Maybe the reason the other person that hurt you in the relationship was hurt themselves and brought their baggage to you.  So can you see how it’s almost like a virus ?  It spreads like an emotional flu.  The cure??  Realize that you are always going to go through difficult times, but you will always come out to see the light.  You just have to have faith. !   God did’t bring you this far just to let you fall.

Keeping Life In-Focus…

Kevin Talley   Tall Guy With The Camera.